Before the Holy Trinity

Back when it was just me and Ryan, we still managed to get in our fair share of trouble. Ryan by no means was a helpless Space Chimp, he had plenty of his own ideas.

Holy Boobs
One of the first times Ryan really expressed himself we were in the car when a good looking young lady went jogging by. Ryan pulling himself up in his car seat to whip his head around shouted "Whoa, Dad did you see that?" "Yup" replied my dad. "He doesn't need any help" my mom let Ryan know.

Whats Your Problem?
Ryan always had a pretty deep voice when we were younger, part of it was probably that we all have naturally deep voices but also the fact that Ryan used to think he was a dog probably made it a little deeper. Once again, in a store, Ryan was shouting about something when an older lady came around the corner and said "Ohh my what deep voice you have". Ryan being a typical Randolph kid fired back with "Whats your problem old lady?"

Its not the size of the bark in the dog but the way your little brother bites your dog
Our first family pet was a Cockerspaniel named Queenie. She was probably the most well behaved dog anyone could ever ask for. Ryan used to have the annoying habit of laying on her back poking at her eyes and pulling her ears. Queenie was normally pretty fine with this but one day she had finally had enough. She let out the smallest growl at Ryan. Ryan thinking he was a dog himself wasn't about to take this bull shit. He turned around and bit Queenie on the butt. She let out a yelp and my mom came running around the corner to find Ryan with a mouth full of fur and Queenie running off. "What happened?" my mom asked, "I bit her" Ryan said spitting fur out of his mouth.

Johnny Jump Up and Ryan Bounce A lot

So Ryan's favorite toy when he was young was his Johnny Jump Up. Ryan would bounce in this thing all day, and this was the first time I tried to launch Space Chimp into orbit. I figured out that the Johnny Jump Up was essentially a sling shot. When Ryan was jumping around and I had a window I would grab Ryan by the feet pulling back until the elastics were stretched tight and then I would send him flying. If it was for the ceiling I probably could have gotten him into space.

Ryan also had the habit and sitting in the back of vehicles and rocking back and forth so hard that you could actually feel the car move back and forth when you were stopped. He would do it for hours at a time. To this day Ryan still does this slightly but he does have a killer set of abs, probably due to his obsessive rocking.